Day 17 on the carnivore diet: I’m starting to feel like a true predator. I roam the grocery store aisles with my eyes fixed on the meat section, salivating at the sight of juicy ribeyes and roasts. I’ve even started growling at my vegetarian friends who virtue signal their herbivore diets. (If you’re not virtue signaling, then you’re safe, I won’t be growling at you).
All that meat is doing wonders for my back pain so far – at least I’m hopeful it will continue. Actually, the meat may not be doing anything; it’s what I’m NOT eating/drinking that I’m hoping will reduce inflammation. Who knew that cutting out vegetables and grains and carbs could make such a difference? I’m pretty sure I could bench press a small car if I wanted to. (One that I’ve 3d printed and weighs 8 oz.).
My only concern now is how to break the news to my virtue-signaling vegetarian friends. Do I start with a gentle warning, or just dive straight into a primal roar and scare them off? Either way, I’m feeling good and ready to conquer the world, one steak at a time.”